Expand Your Fempire Podcast #62 Transcript

Insights to Achieve Mindset Mastery in Business & Life, Part 1

Welcome to Expand your Fempire with Caterina Rando, the podcast for women in business on a mission. Sharing ideas to support you to grow and thrive. Now here’s your host, Caterina Rando.

[00:00:24] Welcome back to another episode of the Expand Your Fempire podcast. This is your host Caterina Rando, and I am blissing to be with you today.

[00:00:38] Extra excited about our discussion today, because this episode is part one of our two-part discussion on mastering your mindset. This topic is so important that we’re taking extra time to focus on you mastering your mindset. Come back next week for part two. But first of course, listen to this episode.

[00:01:09] I want you to master your mindset so that you can bliss and thrive more in your business and in your life.

[00:01:20] Now, what is your mindset? I’ve read many different definitions of mindset and more or less, it comes down to a set of beliefs or ideas or assumptions that we have about everything- about ourselves, about life, about our culture, about our community.

[00:01:45] Mindset also relates to your natural disposition with your attitude. Are you positive? Are you sarcastic? Are you a realist? Are you negative? All of these things in your general attitude, disposition impacts your mindset as well.

[00:02:07] For example, someone might have a belief that everybody’s out to get them. Well, of course, this is going to impact how they think, every experience that they have. Someone could come up to them and say “hello,” and they could think, “oh, that’s so nice that someone’s at a low,” or they could think, “well, what do they want?” or “what’s their agenda?” Because their mindset is that somebody is always out to get them.

[00:02:37] Hopefully that’s not your mindset. Hopefully, you feel like there’s lots of good in the world and that people are for the most part good. And that everybody that comes in contact with you wants to shine some of their light on you.

[00:02:54] In our time together today, I’m going to discuss with you many things that will support you in impacting your mindset to the degree that this can make a huge difference in your life, in your beliefs, in your actions, in your behaviors, because you are focused on mastering your mindset. And that is what I’m hoping you’re going to do after our time together.

[00:03:27] My first request of you is that you be committed to mastering your mindset. That you say, “okay, Caterina, that sounds good. I want to become a master of my mindset.”

[00:03:42] Because as you know, life is dynamic. Your mental state is dynamic. It’s always changing and I want it to change for good. I want that for you. I want that for everybody.

[00:03:57] I’m going to discuss with you right now, a series of things. And some of them might be reminders for you to shine the spotlight if you’re being consistent with them. And some of them might be things that you have had no attention on. And if you feel it would be of benefit to you, let’s go ahead and bring these things in.

[00:04:18] First one, be committed to mastering your mindset. Be committed to getting better and better at having your mind and your mindset work for you. Because your thinking, your mindset, your overall attitude and disposition is one of the most important tools you have for your business success.

Because your thinking, your mindset, your overall attitude and disposition is one of the most important tools you have for your business success.  -Caterina Rando

[00:04:46] Your ability to think solve problems, be focused on solutions, come up with more brilliant ideas… all of this is going to support you to thrive in bliss in your business and your life.

[00:05:01] Number two, perfection is not required. This is a guiding principle for my business and my life I want to invite you to embrace. Because when we’re pursuing perfection or even excellence the first time we’re doing something, what we’re doing is we’re putting too much pressure on ourselves.

[00:05:32] And do you know what happens when you put too much pressure on yourself? You get short with people, you start to snap at people. People that are prone to anger and outbursts of rage, sometimes it’s because they’re pursuing perfection that they get discouraged, disappointed, frustrated with themselves.

[00:05:55] I want you to check in on this with yourself. Because if you’re pursuing perfection, what’s going to happen? You’re going to get ready to get ready. You’re never going to get going. Because how can you be perfect when you’ve never done something before? Or it’s the first time? Or you haven’t mastered it yet?

[00:06:14] Be more committed to action and doing a good job; let’s leave perfection to the side.

[00:06:23] Related to this is another guiding principle that I embrace, that I want to invite you to embrace. And it’s a little bit quirky maybe, but here it is.

[00:06:37] In life, there are going to be breaks. There are going to be spills. You know, you’re going to break a dish. You’re going to spill the milk or the tea or the coffee. There’s going to be stuff in your pantry that is expired. There’s going to be deliveries that come late. There’s going to be people that come late or early. There is going to be orders when you go to a restaurant that are not going to be quite right.

[00:07:08] This is all part of life. And I’m sharing this with you because why don’t you make a decision once, like right now, that you’re not going to get upset for the rest of your life, about any of this stuff?

[00:07:25] Just today, I was coming up the stairs. I had my computer. I had my beverage. I was carrying five other things and you know what? My beverage fell all over the stairs. For a moment I was upset and then I reminded myself, “Caterina, spills are part of life.”

[00:07:48] And guess what? That immediately took away any upset or frustration. Because these things… imperfections… that’s part of life. Let’s have you decide right now for the next 50, 60, 80 years -you’re not going to let any of this upset you. Bing, bing, bing! This is going to support you in mastering your mindset.

[00:08:16] Okay. Let’s take a deep breath. Ah.

[00:08:21] Number three, master yourself talk. Here’s the thing, your supposed to be on your side. Not on your back. You’re supposed to be lifting yourself up, having positive self-talk. Not negative self-talk.

[00:08:43] And it’s very interesting because you may know that the average person has 70% negative or worrying thoughts every day. Did you know that?

[00:08:56] Here’s the beautiful thing about that though. When you simply set an intention that you are going to have more positive self-talk, that you’re not going to worry as much, you can take that 70%, all the way down to 40%. That’s with one action.

[00:09:16] Imagine if you had a standard operating procedure in your life that you did not talk negatively about yourself. And by the way, I want you to notice, how are you reacting right now as I say that? No negative self-talk. If you’re having a reaction right now, like, “This is impossible,” then it’s all the more reason for you to shine the spotlight on this.

[00:09:45] I remember years, years, years ago, probably 20 + years ago, I would say to my friend, Mary, I would say “Mary, no negative self-talk” when I would hear her talk down about herself.

[00:10:00] Do you know, she told her daughter, she told her husband, “no negative self-talk.” She started to monitor her self-talk. If she was with me and I ever said anything negative, she would tell me, “Caterina, no negative self-talk.” she would send me texts, “no negative self-talk.” It became a part of not only our relationship, her life.

[00:10:23] And eventually my negative self-talk totally diminished. Now, I’m not going to tell you I am a hundred percent no negative self-talk. I’m telling you, it is a skill that you can master. You can get that negative self-talk way down.

[00:10:43] Because remember you’re supposed to be your own best success coach. You’re supposed to be the one that lifts you up, because you’re the one who’s with yourself 24- 7.

[00:10:56] Make sure that you’re lifting yourself up. That you are saying positive things to yourself. And if you catch yourself, and I do encourage you to catch yourself if you’re talking negatively to yourself, then replace that with some positive statements to remind yourself that you’re awesome. This is a key, key piece, not only to mindset mastering to life blissing.

[00:11:26] Okay, we have talked about being committed to mastering your mindset. To remembering that perfection is not required. To committing yourself to mastering yourself talk, being your own best success coach, being on your side.

[00:11:44] Number four, use inquiry questions to find solutions and lighten your load.

[00:11:50] What is an inquiry question? And inquiry question is a question that you ask yourself over and over until the solution or ideas, variety of ideas even reveal themselves.

[00:12:09] Now, I want to pause here to tell you that the questions you ask yourself are very powerful. You could say to yourself, “why am I so lacking?” And guess what? Your brain, your fabulous mind will give you some answers.

[00:12:26] Or you could ask your mind, ” how can I be more awesome?” and your mind will come up with solutions for that.

[00:12:34] Instead of saying to yourself, “can I do this, or can I do that?” You want to say to yourself, “how can I?”

[00:12:45] Let’s say you have a big sales goal and you have no idea how you’re going to. Don’t say to yourself, “will I get there or I won’t get there?” Well, that’s not helpful. Say to yourself, “how can I get there?” And keep asking yourself that question.

[00:13:06] Put a post-it note on your computer or your mirror in the bathroom. “How can I get my goal? How can I, whatever it is?” And you will see that ideas will start to come to you.

[00:13:24] Let’s take it one step further and use your fabulous, beautiful, wonderful super-smart subconscious to work on your inquiry question for you. How do you do that? You simply say to yourself before you go to bed, “Okay subconscious. Okay, mind, work on this question.”

[00:13:53] And I will tell you most of the time you will wake up with the answer being revealed to you. I remember way back when, when I was writing tons of articles and had deadlines all the time, sometimes I had no idea what I was going to write about. Or I knew what I was going to write about, but I didn’t know what to say about it.

[00:14:16] And I would say to myself before I went to bed, “Okay, subconscious. Start working on my article for tomorrow. Bring me some amazing, brilliant ideas about whatever my topic was.” And as a result, I would always sit down to write and would have a lot more ease getting everything out.

[00:14:40] Use your beautiful subconscious. This is why you want to review your goals at night, before you go to bed. This is why you want to reflect and even say out loud, your compelling vision before you go to bed so that your subconscious can get working on it for you. Number four, use your inquiry questions to find solutions and lighten your load.

[00:15:05] When we say lighten your load, what I mean is the mental weight on you. The mental load that you’re carrying. All these things weighing on your mind. That’s what I want to talk to you about in number five.

[00:15:20] Here’s another super tip to master your mindset, and it is to always do what you can to reduce what is weighing on your mind. We have just discussed a big solution for this in number four with your inquiry questions.

[00:15:42] I want to discuss with you now some other ways that I want to invite you to consistently be lightening what’s weighing on your mind.

[00:15:54] The first thing, which I’m making the assumption if you’re listening to this, this is you anyway. I’m going to remind you though, make sure you’re always operating with integrity everywhere in your business. Always operate with integrity.

[00:16:11] Now, this is where you do what’s right even if you don’t like it. You do what’s right, even if it costs you money. You do what’s right, even when you have to apologize. You do what’s right.

[00:16:24] You operate with integrity. And the more you operate with integrity, the more, you can sleep with ease. And the more you can bliss in your business.

[00:16:33] Next thing to reduce what’s weighing on your mind, easier said than done I know, create financial surplus for yourself. Having been somebody who’s had no surplus to having good amount of surplus makes a huge difference.

[00:16:53] When I say it makes a huge difference, what I’m saying to you is that when you are having a challenge, paying your bills, when you’re having a challenge and are concerned about paying all the people helping you, when you’re concerned about paying yourself, when you’re concerned about what if next month is not a stellar month or the month after that, or the month after that?

[00:17:16] This results in you usually working way too hard. Results in you not mastering your self-care, letting some of your self-care go. And it also results in you being reactive versus proactive.

[00:17:33] Now I get it’s easy for me to say, “Hey, build a lot of financial surplus in your business.”

[00:17:39] What I do want to say to you though, is have this absolutely be an objective for your company this year ASAP. Why? Because it is often money issues that weigh on you mentally, your mental wellbeing is what we’re talking about here. And that’s why I want to encourage you to put your attention on this.

[00:18:09] I remember a day many, many years ago, I was in my thirties I think. And I got this bill, my credit card bill at the end of the month. And it was a $10,000 bill. And I remember feeling, “oh my gosh, how am I ever going to pay this bill? I’m so stressed out about it.” Well, the bill got paid.

[00:18:32] Now these days I don’t actually use credit cards. I only use debit cards because I don’t like to get that big bill at the end of the month. There’s a lot less strain on my mental state because I’m on top of my money. I review my accounts on an almost daily basis. I make sure I know everything that’s gone going out, everything that’s coming in.

[00:18:59] Of course, I have a bookkeeper that does her job. I have an accountant that does his job. And my level of financial confidence is a thousand times higher than it was before when I was having challenges.

[00:19:17] And part of the challenges were created because I was not feeling confident about my finances and my money so I wasn’t giving that aspect of my business, the attention it deserves and merits. I just wanted it to keep focusing on generating more revenue, which is more fun. At the same time, we’ve got to run our business like a business, right? And that means that we are paying good attention to our finances on a consistent basis. And this will reduce the mental weight on you when you know what the state of your business is.

[00:20:00] Now we’re discussing here, how to reduce what weighs on your mind. Well, the third thing is related to the second thing that we just discussed, having financial surplus, and that is never hesitate to invest money. Or I even like to say, throw money at a problem if you could make it go away.

[00:20:23] Rather than trying to fix everything and do everything yourself, throw a little money at the problem. Invest a little money. Get an expert to help you. So that you can continue to focus on what’s the best use of your time, but also they’re going to do it faster, better, more efficiently without the stress that it’s going to create you because you’re trying to save a buck.

[00:20:47] Very, very important. Again, this is running your business like a business. Use money to solve problems.

[00:20:58] This episode is part one of our two-part discussion on mastering your mindset. I want you to know I have many more insights and super tips for you because mastering your mindset is an essential, crucial part of thriving and blissing in your business. Remember to come back next week for more super tips on this important topic.

We hope you enjoyed this episode of Expand Your Fempire with Caterina Rando.