Expand Your Fempire Podcast #70 Transcript

Infuse Kindness into Your Business

Welcome to Expand your Fempire with Caterina Rando, the podcast for women in business on a mission. Sharing ideas to support you to grow and thrive. Now here’s your host, Caterina Rando.

[00:00:24] Caterina Rando: Hey, my friends. Today is World Kindness Day, and I thought, “you know what?”, let me talk to my fabulous friends. Because one of the things that I would love for you and for me and for all of us is to embrace more kindness in our business. Let’s infuse more kindness in our business. Why not?

[00:00:53] Because you know what? Your business is supposed to be your bliss. And when you do more kindness in your business, you’re going to bliss, your team is going to bliss more, and even, of course, your amazing clients and potential clients will be blissing more. I hope that you’re blissing right now thinking about this as a possibility for you.

[00:01:20] World Kindness Day was created to encourage good deeds in our community. Now you know what? When you think of your community, you might think of your neighborhood or your church community, or your ethnic community.

[00:01:37] I want you to think about your business community also. And when we think of community, often we think about on the ground, people around us. Well, this pandemic has shown us that we can have people in our community all over the world, or at least in other states.

[00:01:57] I’ve made so many friends during this pandemic and genuine friends that I have never met. Like my friend Heather in Oregon, who’s coming on our Bliss Retreat and is an amazing podcaster. And my friend Gail in North Carolina, who is rocking her Instagram reels. And all kinds of other amazing friends I know you’ve met during the pandemic that you can also include as part of your community.

[00:02:29] So let’s shine the spotlight a little bit on how we can infuse more kindness in our business.

[00:02:39] Today, I gave a speech this morning to a group that I have had the privilege of speaking to many times over the years. One of their kindnesses towards me is they gave me an award some years ago. And I was so happy to be with them today.

[00:02:56] But you know what happened at the end of my speech? I took a little time to share with them and talk with them about acknowledgement. Now, a compliment is always a nice kindness, right? When you say to someone “oh, your hair looks great” or “your outfit looks great” or “you look gorgeous today” or whatever the compliment is.

[00:03:18] Compliments though, in my opinion, are not the same as acknowledgement. Acknowledgement is when you thank somebody for something they’ve done or how they’re being while they’re doing it.

[00:03:33] The part though that I want to invite you to infuse more in your business is acknowledging people for how it impacts you. And this is the discussion that we had this morning at the speech I gave. And do you know what happened? I said to one lady who was the lovely lady who set me up for success with my speech today. I acknowledged her, not just for making sure I was set up for success, not just for the positivity and enthusiasm that she always has every time I see her, but I also acknowledged her for how it impacted me.

[00:04:12] And this is the acknowledgement “pièce de résistance” that I want you to embrace. Don’t just acknowledge people for what they do, “Hey, thanks for helping me.” Don’t just acknowledge them for how they’re being while they’re doing it, but let them know how it impacts you.

[00:04:27] Now, I want to tell you something. As I did this this morning, this lady lit up like a Christmas tree. You could see her smile get so much bigger as she was hearing my words. And then I said to her, Artesia was her name, I said “Artesia, pick someone you would like to acknowledge.” And of course we’re in a zoom meeting. She picks the next gal who starts to cry. The next gal picks a different gal who you can see also lights up. Picked a different gal. We had a mother and two daughters also at this meeting. The tears were going everywhere.

[00:05:08] The room was so uplifted. By just taking a few minutes. We took about 10 minutes for acknowledgement, and I would call it an acknowledgement circle or square- to have everyone in the room be acknowledged by somebody else. I have done this in some of my group meetings with my clients. This is a kindness that I invite you to embrace in your business. We’ve done this with our team. In fact, I need to do it with my team even more.

[00:05:40] Infuse kindness as standard operating procedure in your business and acknowledgement can be a great way you do that. Let’s talk about some other ways.

[00:05:53] When you get on the phone with people, before you talk business, take a moment to acknowledge them, take a moment or a few moments to listen to them. “Hey, how you doing?” And if they say fine, but you can hear that they’re not fine demonstrate that you genuinely care. And ask them “Hey, it’s okay. It’s just me and you. Tell me how you’re doing. I’m here to support you.” Being a good listener is a great kindness that we can extend to the people we’re talking to.

[00:06:25] Do you know what else I did today? I sent a text message to the lady who cleans my house. Her name is Ellie. I love Ellie. She brings her friend Sylvia, they clean my house once every two weeks. I said “my friend, thank you so much for all your love and support in my life.” Because you know what? She may not think of herself as this way, but I think of Ellie and Sylvia as two gals that are supporting me significantly.

[00:06:50] Take a moment to let the people in your life know –and in your business– what they mean to you. This is very important. This is a huge skill. It doesn’t cost you anything. And also send some texts every so often, letting people know how much you appreciate their contribution.

[00:07:11] What else can you do? You know, one of the things we do around here in my business is we infuse philanthropy in our business. We look at what charities we want to support. We’ve had our Giving Circle for years, and you don’t have to have a huge business to make huge impact with philanthropy.

[00:07:32] At our Shero Summit we did in September, we raised over $9,000 for our charity, which was Sahki for Girls’ Education in Mumbai. Doesn’t cost the business anything. Well, of course, I make a contribution myself through the business. But it just takes a little focus to give people an opportunity to give.

[00:08:00] Also, when your clients ask you, they say “Hey, my son is having a, a drive they’re selling gift wrapping” and “Hey, I’m doing a breast cancer walk” or “Hey, my daughter’s school needs new books” or whatever it is. Always write a check. Always be a yes.

[00:08:24] In fact, this is my standard operating procedure since I started my business. Be a “insta-yes.” A little bit here, a little bit there, a little bit somewhere else. Make it standard operating procedure, if a client asks you for a contribution, you are an “insta-yes.”

[00:08:42] Now you say “Well Caterina, I don’t know if my business can support that.” Well have you put philanthropy as something that you’re actually budgeting in your business? You could take 1%, 2%, 3%, 5%, 10% monthly, put it in a separate fund for philanthropy or giving. And you will find that you got money to spend on this. Even if you’re not putting a ton in there, it will accumulate, and you will be able to do this. By the way, this is one of the things that the author talks about in Profit First. Have a separate account for this kind of thing. And this is something I want to encourage you to do.

[00:09:27]  Social media: taking time to say to people what a great post they did, how inspiring their post was for you. Again, it doesn’t cost you anything and it lifts other people up.

[00:09:42] By the way. You know me, I love to infuse kindness, love, in my business as standard operating procedure. We send out client appreciation gifts. We like to do cards. We do all kinds of things because it’s a kindness and it’s good for business.

[00:10:04] And, you know, I’ll tell you the truth here. This is the open kimono segment of this discussion. When somebody on my team says “you know, that doesn’t work for me” or ” I don’t want to do that.” You know what? We find somebody else. Because I want everybody on my team to be blissing that they’re on my team. Now, that doesn’t mean everything goes great a hundred percent of the time. But my point is that it’s my intention that the people on my team love being on my team.

[00:10:34] And it’s my intention that my clients love being my client. And when they asked me for some adjustment, we accommodate them. I do everything I can to be a yes for any request my clients make of me. Guess what? That is kindness in action, in business.

[00:10:57] So check in with yourself. Are you using your business to spread kindness and compassion and love, or are you using it for something else? Because it’s not just about the bottom line.

[00:11:10] Your business is supposed to be your bliss. Is your business your bliss? And if it’s not, then let me encourage you to look at how you can infuse more kindness and love in it.

[00:11:24] I want you to infuse more kindness and love in your business, not just for your clients and your team… for yourself.

[00:11:33] Let’s take a moment to talk about that. Because, one of the things I’ve observed in serving so many amazing women over the years is that for many of us, it is way easier to be kind to everyone else than to be kind to ourselves.

[00:11:57] You know, when I was with these fabulous ladies at my speech this morning, we talked about this. And some of you grew up in households where every time you’re doing something for yourself, you were getting called selfish. Or you were, maybe not called selfish, but you were reminded a thousand times that you have to take care of your brothers and sisters, you have to help out the family. And all that’s fine.

[00:12:27] But that message often translated to: it’s not okay to shine the spotlight on yourself. It’s not okay to be good and loving and kind to yourself. That if you want to take a bubble bath or go to the spa, “oh, that’s indulgent.” No, my friend, that’s not indulgent. That’s called self-care. That’s called self-love. That’s called being kind to yourself.

[00:12:59] And I share this with you because I want you to look at: how can you be more kind to yourself? Now you can do those things, like going to get a manicure or pedicure or going and buying yourself a little something, new pair of earrings I just got from Sonia at Cosmo Chic. You can absolutely do that.

[00:13:24] Let’s talk about some other things you could do.

[00:13:26] You can make a new friend. You know, there used to be this idea like after a certain age you don’t make any new friends. My friends, I make new friends every year. I love making new friends. It doesn’t matter that they haven’t been friends for 25, 30 years. Yes. That’s a whole ‘nother category. Make new friends and keep the old. One is silver and the other’s gold. I learned that when I was a girl scout a hundred thousand years ago, and I still think of that today. Make new friends. Of course keep the old, as long as they’re loving and supportive. One is silver and the other’s gold. But you know what? They’re both precious metals, just like you.

[00:14:12] I’m gonna ask you: when was the last time you made a new friend? And you know what? You can do it on social media, or you can make new friends every day. It’s very easy. Get to have a zoom connect. This is one of the things you can do to be kind to yourself.

[00:14:25] What else? Now, take a bath. I’m very big on baths these days. My friend Shannon Sundberg, she makes the most fabulous salt bath aroma therapy packages. Put in your bath with detox, wellness, et cetera. When was the last time you did that?

[00:14:44] When was the last time you bought flowers for yourself? By the way, Costco delivers flowers to my house once a week. I ask for the orange roses every week, they send me whatever they want. Love it! I can’t wait for somebody to buy me flowers, I’ve been waiting a long time. Hopefully I won’t be waiting very long at all.

[00:15:09] But the thing is, I’m going to be good to myself and I want to encourage you to do the same. Take yourself out for a meal. Take yourself to a museum or a art gallery. Don’t wait. Or better yet, ask a friend to go with you, or two friends, or three friends, or five friends. The more kindness you can bestow on yourself, the more you’re going to find that you’re doing it for other people as well.

[00:15:42] Now, before we wrap up our kindness discussion today, I want to talk to you about your kindness or lack of it up here in your brain. Because sometimes you might do kind things for yourself, but you’re not being kind to yourself.

[00:16:03] You’re not talking to yourself like somebody who’s on your side. You’re talking to yourself more like somebody who’s on your back. And I want to invite you to pay very close attention to your self-talk and pay very close attention to the guiding principles that you are embracing in your life.

[00:16:30] For example, many years ago, I decided: anything breaks, anything spills, we’re not going to get upset about it. Why? That’s part of life. Anybody that’s late? No problem. I went to get my hair done last week. The lady was pretty late. Don’t matter. I got my Instagram right here, chat with my friends on Facebook. No problem. When people are behind schedule, I got no shortage of stuff to do. You do too.

[00:17:05] What are these things that bother you that maybe you just want to give yourself a break about and not get upset about it for the next 50 years? Cause guess what? It’s gonna happen. Why bother?

[00:17:17] Tickets? Same thing. You get a ticket, you get a ticket. So what? It’s part of life. You letting these things bother you, is interfering with your bliss. This is an opportunity for you to be more kind to yourself.

[00:17:31] Also, what’s your level of requiring perfection from yourself in your life? I like to tell ladies in our community, perfection is not required. It’s not even encouraged. But are you expecting it of yourself?

[00:17:45] I’m doing, right now, accountability with one of my good friends around our exercise and our slim down food. Now some days it goes great. Some days it doesn’t go as great.

[00:17:59] By the way, get an accountability buddy. This is a great kindness you can do for yourself around something that you’re both working on.

[00:18:07] Now, she said to me, she said “oh, today didn’t go that great, blah, blah, blah.” But she said “I did this and I did this and I did this” –good things for herself. And I said “great job! Perfection’s not required.”

[00:18:21] And how are you doing with yourself around this? How are you doing with your self-talk? Are you your own best success coach or not? Because even if you have a great partner, even if you have great friends, you’re the one that’s with you 24/7. And I want to encourage you to be so kind to yourself.

[00:18:47] Take a deep breath with me right now. And I want you to ask yourself, what can you do to be more kind to yourself?

[00:18:59] By the way, you know, I wrote down a few ideas about ways to be kind to yourself and one of them is, you know, tidy up your house so it feels great. But then I said, “no, get somebody to help you tidy up your house.”

[00:19:13] Because one of the most important things, and I know this for all of you high-achieving women, get more support in your life. Get more support with all the things that you don’t like to do, or that frustrate you, or you’re not good at. Getting support is a kindness you can give yourself.

[00:19:34] Because my friend, you are an amazing woman with massive value to bring, and the more kind you are to yourself, and the more kindness you infuse in your business, in your relationships, as standard operating procedure, the more you’re going to bliss in your business and your life. And the more you bliss, the more vitality you have to sell more, so you can serve more, so you can uplift more lives. That’s what business is all about, right? That’s what building your Fempire is all about.

[00:20:11] I’m saying to you with love. My honor and privilege to share this time with you today. By the way, reach out to me. I’d love to talk with you about being a part of our amazing Thriving Women in Business Community. We do Clubhouse every Friday. Right now it’s Friday at 5:00 PM, we’ll be changing the time. Join our Clubhouse room, Thriving Women in Biz Club. Come to our room. My intention for every room we host in that club is that you come and you leave more uplifted than when you showed up. Join us on Clubhouse. Follow me on Instagram. Join our Facebook group, if you’re not a member of our Thriving Women in Biz Facebook group.

[00:20:55] Because one of the greatest kindnesses we can do for ourselves, is to have support in our life with other amazing like-minded like-hearted women on a mission, just like us. They inspire us. They support us. We share resources with each other. We collaborate and we all get about the business of uplifting lives through our business.

[00:21:24] My friend, sending you some love. Sending you some kindness. Call on me anytime for any reason. And do remember that your heart is so big, that you can infuse your business and your life with so much kindness and you’ll have even more. It’s like a endless supply. It never goes away.

[00:21:48] Have a great day. Sending you more love. Caterina Rando. Bing bing bing. Can’t wait to be with you again here or somewhere else.

We hope you enjoyed this episode of Expand Your Fempire with Caterina Rando.